Small Change ---- PG17

A woman says to her mother, 'I'm divorcing Sheldon. All he wants is anal sex, and my ass hole is now the size of a quarter, when it used to be about the size of a dime.'

Her mother says, 'You're married to a multi-millionaire businessman, you live in an 8 bedroom mansion, you drive a Ferrari, you get $1,000 a week allowance, you take 6 vacations a year and you want to throw all that away over 15 cents?!!'

5.12 Earthquake Anniversary

China has more than its share of disasters, natural and man-made. From recent history, we have farmer army turned to killers/rapers in the end of Ming, then the opium pushers from the west, the war criminals from Japan in WW2, Mao’s disasters and two major earthquakes.

This one demonstrates China can survive better than before. We need to prepare for the next disaster. Enforce building codes at a reasonable cost.

Special thanks to our schoolmate Malcolm who went to the disaster area to help and all who donated.

Here are 2 of the many links to very powerful, emotional pictures.

click here for link #1

click here for link #2

Click here for carton.

Click here for a good story to show human spirit.

Click here for another emotional story.

A lady and her hat



An old lady was standing at the railing of the cruise ship
holding her hat tight so that it would not blow away in the wind.

A gentleman approached her and said, "Pardon me, madam.
I do not intend to be forward but did you know that your dress
is blowing up in this high wind?"

"Yes, I know," said the lady. "I need both my hands
to hold onto this hat."

"But madam, you must know that you are not wearing any under clothes
and your privates are exposed!" said the gentleman in earnest.

The woman looked down, then back up at the man and replied,
"Sir, anything you see down there is 85 years old.
I just bought this hat yesterday!"

Bounce!!!

Bounce This Along!

The US Postal service sent out a message to all letter carriers to put a sheet of Bounce in their uniform pockets to keep yellow-jackets away.

Use them all the time when playing baseball and soccer. I use it when I am working outside. It really works. The insects just veer around you.

All this time you've just been putting Bounce in the dryer!

1. It will chase ants away when you lay a sheet near them. It also repels mice.

2. Spread sheets around foundation areas, or in trailers, or cars that are sitting and it keeps mice from entering your vehicle.

3. It takes the odor out of books and photo albums that don't get opened too often.

4. It repels mosquitoes. Tie a sheet of Bounce through a belt loop when outdoors during mosquito season..

5. Eliminate static electricity from your television (or computer) screen..

6. Since Bounce is designed to help eliminate static cling, wipe your television screen with a used sheet of Bounce to keep dust from resettling.

7. Dissolve soap scum from shower doors. Clean with a sheet of Bounce.

8. To freshen the air in your home - Place an individual sheet of Bounce in a drawer or hang in the closet.

9. Put Bounce sheet in vacuum cleaner.

10. Prevent thread from tangling. Run a threaded needle through a sheet of Bounce before beginning to sew.

11. Prevent musty suitcases. Place an individual sheet of Bounce inside empty luggage before storing.

12. To freshen the air in your car - Place a sheet of Bounce under the front seat.

13. Clean baked-on foods from a cooking pan. Put a sheet in a pan, fill with water, let sit overnight, and sponge clean. The anti-static agent apparently weakens the bond between the food and the pan.

14. Eliminate odors in wastebaskets. Place a sheet of Bounce at the bottom of the wastebasket.

15. Collect cat hair. Rubbing the area with a sheet of Bounce will magnetically attract all the lose hairs.

16. Eliminate static electricity from Venetian blinds. Wipe the blinds with a sheet of Bounce to prevent dust from resettling.

17. Wipe up sawdust from drilling or sand papering. A used sheet of Bounce will collect sawdust like a tack cloth.

18. Eliminate odors in dirty laundry. Place an individual sheet of Bounce at the bottom of a laundry bag or hamper.
19. Deodorize shoes or sneakers. Place a sheet of Bounce in your shoes or sneakers overnight.
20. Golfers put a Bounce sheet in their back pocket to keep the bees away.

21. Put a Bounce sheet in your sleeping bag and tent before folding and storing them. It will keep them smelling fresh.
22. Wet a Bounce sheet, hose down your car, and wipe lovebugs off easily with the wet Bounce.

Quick, bounce this along! Nothing will happen if you don't, but your friends will be glad to hear these hints!

Convincing ad from lottery

Can you believe it? This guy wins $25 million playing the lottery on a Wednesday, and then finds a fiancée just two days later. Talk about Luck!

Chinese jokes

It is from Houston Chinatown website. Some jokes have been included in this blog. Click here.

Medical Alert!

Forward notice from: The Center for Disease Control has issued a medical alert about a highly contagious, potentially dangerous virus that is transmitted orally, by hand, and even electronically. This virus is called Weary Overload Recreational Killer (WORK).

If you receive WORK from your boss, any of your colleagues or anyone else via any means whatsoever - DO NOT TOUCH IT. This virus will wipe out your private life completely. If you should come into contact with WORK you should immediately leave the premises. Take two good friends to the nearest store and purchase one or both of the antidotes - Work Isolating Neutralizer Extract (WINE) and Bothersome Employer Elimination Rebooter (BEER). Take the antidote repeatedly until WORK has been completely eliminated from your system.

It is recommended that you should immediately forward this medical alert to five friends. If you do not have five friends, you have already been infected and WORK is controlling your life.