Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Greatest thinkers on earth

UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE (BBC2)
Jeremy Paxman:
What is another name for 'cherrypickers' and 'cheesemongers'?
Contestant:
Homosexuals.
Paxman:
No. They're regiments in the British Army who will be very upset with you.

BEG, BORROW OR STEAL
(BBC2)

Jamie Theakston:
Where do you think
Cambridge University is?
Contestant:
Geography isn't my strong point.
Theakston:
There's a clue in the title.
Contestant
:
Leicester?

BBC
NORFOLK
Stewart White
: Who had a worldwide hit with What A Wonderful World?
Contestant:
I don't know.
White:
I'll give you some clues: what do you call the part between your hand and your elbow?
Contestant:
Arm.
White:
Correct. And if you're not weak, you're...?
Contestant:
Strong.
White:
Correct - and what was Lord Mountbatten's first name?
Contestant:
Louis.
White:
Well, there we are then. So who had a worldwide hit with the song What A Wonderful World?
Contestant:
Frank Sinatra?

LATE SHOW
(BBC
MIDLANDS)
Alex Trelinski:
What is the capital of
Italy ?
Contestant:
France
Trelinski:
France is another country. Try again.
Contestant:
Oh, um, Benidorm.
Trelinski:
Wrong, sorry, let's try another question. In which country is the Parthenon?
Contestant:
Sorry, I don't know.
Trelinski:
Just guess a country then.
Contestant:
Paris?

THE WEAKEST LINK
(BBC2)

Anne Robinson
:- Oscar Wilde, Adolf Hitler and Jeffrey Archer have all written books about their experiences in what:-Prison, or the Conservative Party?
Contestant:
The Conservative Party?

BEACON RADIO
(
WOLVERHAMPTON )
DJ Mark:
For Pounds 10, what is the nationality of the Pope?
Ruth from Rowley Regis
: I think I know that one.. Is it Jewish?

UNIVERSITY
CHALLENGE

Bamber Gascoigne:
What was Gandhi's first name?
Contestant:
Goosey?

GWR FM
(
Bristol )
Presenter:
What happened in
Dallas on November 22, 1963?
Contestant:
I don't know, I wasn't watching it then.

RTE RADIO 2FM
(
IRELAND )
Presenter:
What is the name of the long- running TV comedy show about pensioners: Last Of The .?
Caller:
Mohicans.

PHIL WOOD
SHOW (BBC RADIO
MANCHESTER )
Phil:
What's 11 squared?
Contestant:
I don't know.
Phil:
I'll give you a clue. It's two ones with a two in the middle.
Contestant:
Is it five?

RICHARD AND
JUDY
Show
Q:
Which American actor is married to Nicole Kidman?
A:
Forrest Gump.

RICHARD AND
JUDY

Leslie:
On which street did Sherlock Holmes live?
Contestant:
Er .
Leslie:
He makes bread .
Contestant:
Er . ..
Leslie:
He makes cakes .
Contestant:
Kipling Street ?

LINCS FM
PHONE-IN

Presenter:
Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?
Contestant:
Barcelona
Presenter:
I was really after the name of a country.
Contestant:
I'm sorry, I don't know the names of any countries in
Spain .

NATIONAL LOTTERY (BBC1)
Question:
What is the world's largest continent?
Contestant
: The Pacific?

ROCK FM (
PRESTON)
Presenter:
Name a film starring Bob Hoskins that is also the name of a famous painting by Leonardo Da Vinci.
Contestant:
Who Framed Roger Rabbit?

THE BIGGEST GAME IN TOWN (ITV)

Steve Le Fevre:
What was signed, to bring World War I to an end in 1918?
Contestant:
Magna Carta?

JAMES O'BRIEN SHOW (LBC)

O'Brien:
How many kings of
England have been called Henry?
Contestant:
Er, well, I know there was a Henry the Eighth ... er... ... er... three?

CHRIS SEARLE SHOW (BBC RADIO
BRISTOL )
Searle:
In which European country is
Mount Etna ?
Caller:
Japan?
Searle:
I did say which European country, so in case you didn't hear that, I can let you try again.
Caller:
Er...
Mexico ?

PAUL WAPPAT (BBC RADIO
NEWCASTLE )
Paul Wappat:
How long did the Six-Day War between
Egypt and Israel last?
Contestant (after long pause):
Fourteen days?

DARYL DENHAM'S DRIVETIME (VIRGIN RADIO)
Daryl Denham:
In which country would you spend shekels?
Contestant:
Holland ?
Denham:
Try the next letter of the alphabet.
Contestant:
Iceland ? Ireland ?
Denham (helpfully):
It's a bad line. Did you say
Israel ?
Contestant:
No.

PHIL WOOD SHOW (BBC GMR)

Wood:
What 'K' could be described as the Islamic Bible?
Contestant:
Er . .. .
Wood:
20It's got two syllables . . . Kor . . ..
Contestant:
Blimey?
Wood:
Ha ha ha ha, no. The past participle of run . .
Contestant:
(Silence)
Wood:
OK, try it another way. Today I run, yesterday I . .. .
Contestant:
Walked?

THE VAULT

Melanie Sykes:
What is the name given to the condition where the sufferer can fall asleep at any time?
Contestant:
Nostalgia?

LUNCHTIME SHOW (BRMB)

Presenter:
What religion was Guy Fawkes?
Contestant:
Jewish.
Presenter:
That's close enough.

STEVE WRIGHT IN THE AFTERNOON (BBC RADIO 2)
Wright:
Johnny Weissmuller died on this day. Which jungle-swinging character clad only in a loincloth did he play?
Contestant:
Jesus.

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