Low-life jokes

1. There are 3 Male and 1 Female pencils in a box. The Female pencil got pregnant !! Which Male pencil is responsible? THE ONE WITHOUT THE RUBBER. 2. Woman in bed with husband's best friend, phone rings! 'YES'.. OK, BYE'. She turns to her lover and says, THAT'S MY HUBBY, SAYS HE'S NOW GOLFING WITH YOU.. 3. Three Roosters: normal, retarded and a gay. Normal : cock-a-doodle-dooo !!! Retarded : doodle-cock-a-dooo !!! Gay : any-cock-will dooo !!! 4. Three Guys were introduced to a girl. Hi,...... I'm Peter, not a saint. I'm Paul not a POPE. I'm John not a Baptist... The girl replied.. Hi... I'm Mary, not a VIRGIN. 5. Girlfriends are appetizers. Tastes good at any time. Mistresses are Tomyams..Hot and spicy. Eaten frequently. WIVES are Maggie. Eaten when there's nothing to eat.!!! 6. Income Tax office asked a Prostitute why she puts her occupation as CHICKEN FARMER. She replied: I RAISED 5,000 COCKS LAST YEAR.!! 7. Yesterday's News :- A nun jogging at Jogger' Park was raped by 4 guys. Today's News :- Nearly 100 nuns found jogging at the park. 8. Why do Indians talk non stop? Guess.... Still dunno? OK lah..... Answer : Becoz they left their full stop on their forehead.